Tonight I watched, from a dimly lit living room, as Taylor Swift was honored for her hard work and dedication to the world of courtney music. I shot praise in her direction, and kept my head turned towards the shinning screen as to not let my parents see the tears form in my eyes.
Don't get me wrong. These tears held inklings of joy for Taylor and her ever lasting battle with scrubs which have made her such a relatable character. Though, amongst the joy was quite a bit of grief. For, if you asked me just years ago, I'd have told you that would be me on the stage. Me cupping my face in hands and being kissed lightly on the cheek by The King, George.
Yes, this seems crazy. And yes, it was. But for me the dream of being a singer was very real. It was pack my bags, beg my parents to move to Nashville real. I recorded a demo in a run down mall booth for goodness sakes. I burned it on handfuls of CD's and individually licked the envelopes with a little extra spunk and spit to cart off to record labels that returned them un opened.
For years my parents have supported my dreams. Told me I could be anything my little heart could think up... with just a little smack of reality mixed in. They said that dreams are worth having, but in the end you must survive.
Those words were great, but they were not what I wanted to hear. And as I walked across that black draped stage, and took a faux leather diploma canister, all I could think was that this could not be it. We could not be expected to stash our out-of-this-world dreams for an empty tube. And why? Why should we do it?
Who's to say I am not the next Taylor Swift? Or, on a more realistic note, the next person to share their story. And why can't you be the next big thing? What is actually stopping you from living your dreams?
We tip toe around so many things in life, because we are too scared to just go for it. We fear the bills won't get paid, or that we will fail. But do you think Taylor Swift didn't have those fears too?
What about J.K. Rowling? Think of all the people who turned down her idea for a book series in which the first line "There won't be a child in our world who doesn't know his name," actually came true. Think of those great people you follow and love, and think of why you love them. Because they were not scared. They didn't let life get in their way.
Someone has to be the next big reporter, or the next singer, even the next author. I might never inspire people in the way I wish too, but I'd rather fail trying, than sit in front of a TV pushing away tears for a dream I never chased. Because in the end, if we aren't chasing something, we are sitting still. And I've never seen a concert where the artist sits still.
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