Happy Labor Day all. I hope you are having a fun and relaxing time in the sun while I am writing this silly blog! Yesterday I posted a Tweet from a wonderful show called The Office. The quote read "We all deserve to be with someone who wants to be with us." Of course it got like a million re-tweets, or three... either way.
Love and relationships always seems to be the thing that catches everyones eye. We love being in love, we love talking about who isn't in love, and most of all we LOVE having a broken heart.
You might think that last one is ridiculous, you are probably rolling your eyes right now and shaking your head at the computer screen. But, much like the boy you've been dating for three years who has paid for two of your 12,685 meals together, the words on this screen aren't going to change.
There have been a combination of things that got me to this point in dealing with relationships. One being the time I watched Perks of Being a Wall Flower. Tearing up in my living room as the wise beyond years english teacher, who was incidental eye candy, said to Charlie "We accept the love we think we deserve."
This is the truth, though time and time again we ignore it.
The second thing that got me here was a movie called He's Just Not That Into You. There is an interview section in the movie and this saucy lady is saying how we all lie to one another. We tell our girlfriends that guys like them when they don't and we tell them everything is going to be okay when it already isn't.
This is also the truth, and it is why I have complied this list of things we do wrong as girls in relationships:
1) We Lie
What ends with ourselves begins with our friends. We lie to our friends about their relationships and in return lie to ourselves about our own. So here is the truth for all of you to know: If he doesn't call he isn't into you, this is not some form of sexy game to keep you guessing. If he doesn't go out of his way to be chivalrous he is a jerk, and you don't have time for that. If he avoids seeing you in a sober state then y'all are not dating. Not at all. And if you sleep with someone before you share anything more than a salad he is most likely going to see you for nothing more than a cheap late night phone call.
2) We Play Games
We play games like guys play that fantasy league thing. And seeing that I'm still not sure if it is a video game or a sporting event it is clear these games we play are not good either. As girls we play two types of games, the game with ourselves, and the game with the guy. As hard as we try not too, most girl get attached really easily, so when things go sour in a relationship it hits us really hard. This is the game we play with ourselves. We try to convince ourselves he is the man of our dreams, then we morn over the death of a two week relationship like our family dog just died. It is crazy, but we have convinced ourselves that he was the one, funny thing about it... the last guy was the one as well. And then there is the game we play with guys, we act like we need to wait 20 days between text or send them dirty photos to keep them coming. To you I say this, don't let the guy consume your life from day one and the blow wont be so hard on day 14. Sure, text him back in a timely manner, but don't superglue your phone to your hand like we so eagerly do. Go about your day and go about your life as you did before he so stunningly drunk stumbled in and let things play out naturally.
3) We Settle
This is by far our worst trait as women, or girls if you feel weird saying women like I do. I don't know what it is, but no matter how hard you try to act like a strong independent, there is a part of us that want's our mister right, and to obtain this we settle. We say things like "He is really cute, so I can deal with the fact that he has no brains." Or "It's okay that he doesn't like the same things as me, opposites attract, right?" We are so bad at this that we even do it on a subconscious level. We settle for guys who aren't that into us because we think over time they will change their minds. And I'm sorry to say it, but they won't change their minds. Guys don't change their minds, they either like you or they don't it is plain as that. Though, I am not sorry to say is that you are way better than that. This is not some girl power speech, you really truly are. One day you will find the right guy and you won't be better than that, but if you are bending over backwards to have him stick around, then going home and crying about it every night, you are better than that.
To sum this all up I will pull from one more film. And if you know me, you know that I hardly ever watch movies (obvious by the way I describe characters), so these quotes have truly struck a chord with me. In the movie 500 Days of Summer, the little sister explains that her brother thought he had a wonderful relationship with Summer, but more times than not we let our minds shut out the bad and only focus on the good. And in the end isn't that the truth?
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